It’s Important to Be Regular.

Dear Abby,

Recently I’ve developed an inexplicable fear of toothbrushes and celery. I know both are good for you, but for some reason I just can’t face them anymore though I used to use and love them both.

This fear developed recently after I collapsed in the supermarket and smacked my head on the floor in the produce department. I remember walking in to pick up some celery to add to my famous chicken salad recipe; the next thing I knew, I was on the floor with fellow shoppers crowded around me. One of the women who helped me to my feet said she saw me read something posted over the celery, heard me scream then I “just dropped like a bag of wet cement.”

What can I do to get over these fears? I find myself eyeing, once favored salads with suspicion and batting at anything brush-like that comes hear me. My breath is horrible and I’m just not as regular as I should be.

Also, how can I figure out what caused these irrational fears in the first place?


Backed-up in Boston


Dear Backed-up in Boston,

After doing some research I came across what may be the origin of your fears. Have a seat on the couch and take a look.



epic fail photos - Vegetable Benefit FAIL

Thank you, Fail


About The Sassy Librarian

Librarian. Writer. Curmudgeon.
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